Amazing Grace

How many times have I sung "Amazing Grace" and not even realized in the slightest the gravity of the sweet word... How little I know and understand grace, but how overwhelming it is.

How many times do I wake up to my family, go to school, go to church and think only about myself... No wonder life is so frustrating, you reap nothing when you walk around thinking about your own expectations, instead of seeing through God's eyes and trusting in His hands. How empty, when you think about what you are going to get out of today, instead of what you can do to bless others.

How many times do I go through an entire day and not even remember once about Jesus' love on the Cross. I break my own heart- my forgetful mind, frightful tenacity.

How many times do I dwell on the past, worry about the future- allow Anxious Thought to cloud my mind in its sloth and vulgar murmur, that I forget to live in the present, the only place where I have Choice.

Choice. Today in English, we were talking about choice and how we have so much in our affluent industrialized western society that it in fact paralyzes us and decreases our welfare- not only that, it distracts us from the important choices in life: our attitude, our actions and words towards others, what we allow inside our heads. And the most important of all: dropping everything to follow God now.

And it all leads back to grace. We want to change ourselves so bad, to become patient with snail paced change, to learn to love in all circumstances, to learn to hope... but all we can do is choose to turn to God, choose to say Yes at that very moment, and everything else is up to grace: sweet, enduring, Amazing Grace.