strangely dim

'and the things of earth will grow strangely dim
in the light of his glory and grace'

isn't it such a miracle that when we see one thing,
we our eyes physically focus on only one object,
everything else on the peripheral, everything else surrouding
becomes strangely blurry, strangely dim?

life is a wonder.

too often, i miss these things
and am flooded by complaints, worries
drowned by petty pains... unhappiness... unrest...
too often, i miss out.

today i was having a gigantic stomach-ache,
and i was just thinking of that war that was going on inside my body
how everything was hurting and fighting,
and i was amazed i was still alive after how i don't treat my body well,
and i was able to appreciate how strong my body is,
i really understood what God meant by my body being a temple...
and not only my body, but my mind... my interactions...
everything is a temple
and i have been vandalizing it.

the past few days,
i have procrastinated and procrastinated talking to God
and every night i would look back and say,
i was busy, i filled my day, but what for?
and i would promise to live tomorrow,
but it is seize the day, today.

i think i will be made very small in the next few days,
i am not sure, but i am sure i will be made into something.

i am excited for tomorrow practice at ETCBC,
we are dancing! we are creating a dance,

i really hope tcmedia gets it together,
for our own sakes too, because when we know it well, well, well,
we can worship even when we are on stage.

i guess all i can do is my own part,
and turn my own eyes upon Jesus.

i am a little scared of going to him,
but i know he loves me. and he's beside me,
and outside me and here. now.
and... yes. i am going to go and pray now.

i feel like a baby again.