k-worship & koinonia

k-worship

hallelujah, praise the Lord

sing out (this is how it isn't supposed to be)

but it is, and here we are

and it is a time for Change

and it is a time to stay still and wait

Forgive Me

i only fear that i am not doing enough

valley of the shadow, i ~ not

and we are blinded by love

our eyes are OPENED with Love

words overlapping

words are just a sentance

strung together from the depths of our heart

because our hearts can't cry so our tongues do

our deceitful lips licking; we're sorry

we praise You hallelujah

we say our own words

and we sing with the group

a mistake? a slip of song?

a wrong chord, a missed note?

there are none!

where our sins are forgiven

and our hearts burn with passion

and zeal for our Jesus

where

koinonia

wow koinonia has grown so much

and now i am thrown off my feet because

there is not enough time and we are trapped by it

i want to reach out to every single one of them

i want to hold everyone's hand at least once

(the cultural difference is killing me - there's good and bad)

and tell them i love them, though i know them not

and i love Them because They are a Part of this Christ-body

and i love them because they are not a part of this freedom

and i wonder: how many people are really f r e e?

they say they are but they can't even face it

Lord i can't face this not-facing, so i turn to You

who should i speak to? i reach out to the new and lonely

and my old friends draw away, but it doesn't matter

because You hold everything that is me and not me

i try to give so much, and making myself vulnerable is hard

when people are chatting and not giving back, and it's NOT okay

but we'll have to do... pray pray pray pray pray pray Pray

wow i am bad at leading worship right now

and my team isn't musically the most amazing

and sometimes we get caught up and forget

but now we know, but God will take

this matter of self and make it the un-self, the congregation

and i just want people in koinonia to understand!

worship is not about how we look

it's about how we are praising thanking telling-of asking-for

a Consuming Fire our God

how can people see Christians have something going on

when we can't even sing out loud? it's not about us - it's not

it took me a long time to look outside myself

and realize hey, worship isn't about ME.

worship isn't Worship right now and it's killing me

put in a "leadership" position, which is more servant than anything

and i just want to shake people and say HEY WAKE UP

because there is so much more! and i am not doing enough

i will do my best, and leave everything else

but ya, God, work in us.